tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post7437841722929457244..comments2024-03-28T23:30:19.366-07:00Comments on Being Me: Another adapted fairy tale dripped from My PenFran Hillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-86315235285387271772010-06-29T13:49:01.382-07:002010-06-29T13:49:01.382-07:00Isabelle - Do. Not. Tempt. Me.
Jinksy - Irp for s...Isabelle - Do. Not. Tempt. Me.<br /><br />Jinksy - Irp for short. Also, if you ever want to write a poem about yourself, more things rhyme with irp than with irpoig. I suppose ... haemorrhoid ... at a push .... if that's not an unfortunate metaphor.Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-89005051187776375052010-06-29T11:39:39.828-07:002010-06-29T11:39:39.828-07:00IRPOIG it shall be! lol :)IRPOIG it shall be! lol :)Jinksyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01686101468214361004noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-62674507362829588102010-06-29T09:26:25.443-07:002010-06-29T09:26:25.443-07:00Ok, then, furry kittens.
Can't quite think o...Ok, then, furry kittens. <br /><br />Can't quite think of a classic work featuring kittens but I'm sure there is one. You may take this as a challenge. Beatrix Potter is excluded from this.Pam https://www.blogger.com/profile/12641269043817163165noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-85464877241304918492010-06-28T10:37:22.009-07:002010-06-28T10:37:22.009-07:00Jackie - caravans are good. You never know when y...Jackie - caravans are good. You never know when you might meet a handsome prince in one.<br /><br />Jinksy - that would make an acronym IRPOIG which I think is a fantastic title. 'Arise, Irpoig the 5th and ascend the royal throne'. <br /><br />EternDis - caravans and egg sandwiches belong to a former age which should never have disappeared. It sounds like bliss, that life. Now it's a fortnight in a half-built Malaga hotel and garlic breath as rank as anything.<br /><br />SmitandSon - I think the Snow White in my story will soon be looking for a position such as that. It won't be vacant long.<br /><br />Jayne - Housework only seems attractive when one has an awkward phone call to make or some accounts to do.<br /><br />Mise - the Queen of Cut-out Hearts? Sounds like a nice bedtime tale.<br /><br />Talli - Gordon Ramsay can go in a story, but he's not getting any dialogue. It would wear out the F on my keyboard.Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-46983014948751885352010-06-28T10:00:42.646-07:002010-06-28T10:00:42.646-07:00I snickered all the way through this - thanks, Fra...I snickered all the way through this - thanks, Fran! Can you do another one, please? Maybe featuring Gordon Ramsey this time?Talli Rolandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04780882465745107715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-51617371354740090642010-06-28T09:57:48.515-07:002010-06-28T09:57:48.515-07:00I'm not used to reading Violent Thrillers such...I'm not used to reading Violent Thrillers such as this, but it was gripping right to the end. Being assertive in the comment-box, I suggest your version of The Queen of Hearts (she made some tarts) would be a good read.Misehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01784548726623938608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-43303075455231341102010-06-28T09:10:43.952-07:002010-06-28T09:10:43.952-07:00I always thought Snow White verged on the dim side...I always thought Snow White verged on the dim side. She seemed far too suspeciously keen on house-work. Love the ending!Jaynehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11309191526500602452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-60015638873856091392010-06-28T03:17:50.334-07:002010-06-28T03:17:50.334-07:00I've just seen in the small ads. in "The ...I've just seen in the small ads. in "The Lady" that , somewhere a bit further on in the forest , there are still Seven Small Gentlemen who remain in need of a housekeeper . One free afternoon a week and BUPA .SmitoniusAndSonatahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11210817141287881808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-22419539115270864692010-06-28T01:44:30.248-07:002010-06-28T01:44:30.248-07:00The original never really stuck with me when I was...The original never really stuck with me when I was a kid, I think I was refused the reality that your far better story gives... I mean who likes happy ever after anyway when the alternative involves caravans and egg sandwiches?!! <br /><br />Clearly Skegness and Blackpool win every time :0)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-81681067820778941592010-06-27T22:52:12.882-07:002010-06-27T22:52:12.882-07:00I like to read a story like like this every night,...I like to read a story like like this every night, to ensure entertaining dreams stalk my nightmares! If I were King, I'd hire you on the spot in lieu of a court jester...a totally improbable scenario, as I entered this life as a female, but hey, what's in a name? Perhaps I should just stick with 'Important Royal Personage Of Indeterminate Gender' as a title, instead of 'King'.Jinksyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01686101468214361004noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-62298531942227649552010-06-27T15:34:58.495-07:002010-06-27T15:34:58.495-07:00Well thats put me right off caravans.Well thats put me right off caravans.Jackiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12998628507844056717noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-8519170440388941042010-06-27T14:48:19.200-07:002010-06-27T14:48:19.200-07:00So, can we have Goldilocks and the three beers (ma...So, can we have Goldilocks and the three beers (maybe with some bitter hail), doing porridge in a high-security pub, next, then, please Miss?<br />;)<br />Fun as ever!<br />:)Valhttp://absurdoldbird.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-60705918923044432972010-06-27T14:26:58.105-07:002010-06-27T14:26:58.105-07:00Dear Anonymous Proust - thank you for visiting fro...Dear Anonymous Proust - thank you for visiting from beyond the grave. I knew the Internet was good but didn't think it was good.<br /><br />isabelle - Write the next one about floppy bunnies? If you'd just marked 450 essays about Lennie in 'Of Mice and Men' and his rabbit obsession, you would not ask this of me.<br /><br />The Burrow - glad to be a giggle-supplier. It's what I live for. Apart from chocolate.Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-25191123625033457732010-06-27T14:14:22.682-07:002010-06-27T14:14:22.682-07:00Haha, please don't stay away from your compute...Haha, please don't stay away from your computer! I loved this - gave me exactly the giggle I needed :)Cruella Colletthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11422848273167338884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-14133074150333612152010-06-27T14:04:46.229-07:002010-06-27T14:04:46.229-07:00Argh, Fran, you don't seem to realise that I&#...Argh, Fran, you don't seem to realise that I'm very blood-phobic so I had to read this from between my fingers, omitting some of the grislier aspects. Grue. <br /><br />Please write the next one about floppy bunnies hopping through the meadows. Thank you.Pam https://www.blogger.com/profile/12641269043817163165noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-80878525080494916002010-06-27T13:47:58.650-07:002010-06-27T13:47:58.650-07:00I wish I'd written that.
...M.Proust.I wish I'd written that.<br />...M.Proust.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-22183705225739342182010-06-27T12:11:30.470-07:002010-06-27T12:11:30.470-07:00InvisibleWoman - not in my version it doesn't....InvisibleWoman - not in my version it doesn't. <br /><br />Mark - What's next? Lying down in a darkened room and never coming out again would seem a wise move.Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-26112322884698659352010-06-27T11:17:31.424-07:002010-06-27T11:17:31.424-07:00So, the joints in your arms are nearly frozen from...So, the joints in your arms are nearly frozen from repetitive stress injury, causing you to peck and poke your tales onto the keyboard, you're bleeding from the eyes, and you've nearly been speared at the bus stop, having been mistaken (due to a wardrobe choice) for a game animal. What's next, Fran?Mark Kerstetterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13307987573435067415noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-89518712573036823742010-06-27T06:24:09.486-07:002010-06-27T06:24:09.486-07:00If I ever have a beautiful stepdaughter, I will do...If I ever have a beautiful stepdaughter, I will do her in myself. It's simply impossible to get good staff these days. Hansel and Gretel next please. It features cake.InvisibleWomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16405063925803245217noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-83039708396975784812010-06-27T05:01:20.930-07:002010-06-27T05:01:20.930-07:00Steve - Goldilocks got a very short retelling here...Steve - Goldilocks got a very short retelling here http://ilurveenglish.blogspot.com/2009/03/fairy-tales-la-tarantino.htmlFran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-55384074464956974952010-06-27T01:09:17.565-07:002010-06-27T01:09:17.565-07:00How politically correct. No dwarfs. Just very shor...How politically correct. No dwarfs. Just very short servants. Hired assassins even. Equal rights for all then. <br /><br />Do hope you're going to cover burglary and animal cruelty next in a retelling of Goldilocks...Stevehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02133900289384226725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-14068100220615582082010-06-26T15:41:33.067-07:002010-06-26T15:41:33.067-07:00Friko - all the advisors were on strike, and the s...Friko - all the advisors were on strike, and the stepmother thing is a mistake, promptly put right, and for notice of which I thank you.Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-72367821570177283382010-06-26T15:29:11.583-07:002010-06-26T15:29:11.583-07:00Fran, you are completely mad.
But there are two t...Fran, you are completely mad. <br />But there are two things I don't believe: <br /><br />a) a king with poor eyesight and worse taste has a lot of advisors milling about his court to warn him about a bad judgement call. He'd have kept the 2nd queen in a morganatic relationship. It's what kings do. (Unless you are looking at a Royal House nearer home than fairyland?)<br /><br />b) seeing that the king in your story actually married the hunchback with the skin condition, and the two of them promptly produced the simpering beauty (being far from beautiful myself I consider beauty in females much overrated), at what point does no. 2 actually turn into the wicked stepmother? I mean, how does that work?<br /><br />I think I should be told. After all, it's bad enough having one's faith in fairy tales shaken - without confusing natural phenomena.<br /><br />This comment is nearly as long as your story.<br /><br />Sorry.Frikohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04277167831642088694noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-92031621988393636572010-06-26T15:23:55.330-07:002010-06-26T15:23:55.330-07:00Kit - thank you for being impressed by my literary...Kit - thank you for being impressed by my literary inventiveness. I'm sure even Proust would have thought, 'If only I'd written that!'Fran Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07935088780461825341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74882821337502001.post-39038494638393549002010-06-26T14:44:03.912-07:002010-06-26T14:44:03.912-07:00Best line, EVER:
"She dumped the spindle as...Best line, EVER: <br /><br />"She dumped the spindle as sewing didn't float her boat."<br /><br />Wonderful!Kit Courteneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07211606676705095432noreply@blogger.com