rejection letters I have known and hated

Trying to sell a novel (NO, IT'S NOT AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL) opens you up to levels of hurt not experienced before. Try some of these extracts from my rejection letters. Wannabe novelists, leave me some of your own as comments. It helps to know others suffer, too.

"We can only take the novels that we instantly fall in love with. With yours, unfortunately, this was not the case." (Implied: We HATED this.)

"We wish you luck in finding a home for this." (Implied: You'll need it. Lots. And, garage room? You must be joking.)

"Unfortunately, there is lots of this kind of stuff about, and yours has nothing different from any of the rest." (No implication there, then ...)

"We wish you the best in finding someone more receptive than we have been." (Implied: We feel we have been very kind, but are pretending otherwise.)

Bring on the Prozac.

Comments

  1. The Japanese Student9/2/09 09:37

    Ouch.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Fran Hill9/2/09 14:10

    Yes, Hillel, very ouch. Very 'a man walked into a bar', in fact.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mr. Nall11/2/09 09:35

    Oh dear, they do sound painful! Might I ask how you went about submitting your manuscript? Did you get an agent? I'm hoping to polish up 'De Factoids' somewhere down the line, you see.

    Best,

    AJN
    http://adamjamesnall.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  4. Fran Hill12/2/09 14:53

    Hi AJN - yes, I'm trying literary agents mostly because the word on the publishing street seems to be not to bother going to publishers straight off because they won't look at unagented writers. Still, I'm trying to sell my fiction, and your genre might be different. Do you have the Writers' Handbook for this year? All the agents/pubishers and their requirements/preferred genres are in there.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Count Sneaky1/3/09 09:04

    Thank you for your kind words and for following my blog. Blogs are a wonderful to learn to deal with rejection and develop the elephanine epidermis needed to become a writer.Becoming published as a writer then requires learning a few obscene hand gestures and how to dance "'til the sun comes up!" as Mehitabel the Cat says in Don Marquis' wonderful old book about archy the cockroach who is a writer. The best. Count Sneaky

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Reasons why Fran is desperately in search of earbuds

Image
My try-to-get-fitter walk in the fields today was a silent one. I usually listen to the radio through earphones but have lost one of the soft earbuds and nothing spoils a walk more than having hard plastic nudging up against your fragile tympanic membrane. The BBC's  'Woman's Hour' is a brilliant programme but loyalty has limits.  It was disconcerting, walking in silence. Listening to radio distracts from the disturbing reality that my legs are propelling me in forward motion because, if I think too hard about this, I frighten myself.  Today, while walking, I had to listen to my own thoughts.  And now I've listened to my own thoughts, I remember why I like radio better. The inside of my head is like a wastepaper basket.   Be grateful that I only offer you a brief excerpt.  Oh, look, that bird is - / Where did I put that mark scheme. I'll need it for - / My shoes are getting muddier./ Maybe mash with the fish tonight / really muddy / The trees are defin...
Read more

More evidence that the wrong consonant makes all the difference to a famous book title

Image
More typo-lit, one of my favourite genres: To Kilt a Mockingbird - a tale set in the Southern States of America in which a young family move into the area from Aberdeen.  The children are found dressing the local wildlife in tartan and have to be taught that clothing innocent victims in bright material is not acceptable.  The little girl (Scot) says, 'Shoot, Pa, that's the darndest thing I ever did hear!' and there is surprise all round at her adoption of the local dialect in such a short time. To Kiln a Mockingbird - a tale set in the Southern States of America in which a wise father teaches his children that to put an innocent bird into a red-hot oven, converting it into an attractive china piece for the kitchen, was bound to upset Aunt Alexandra when given as a birthday present, and if this was indeed their intention, they deserved a whipping.   They don't get the whipping; the father can't stand Aunt Alexandra either. To Bill a Mockingbird - a tale set ...
Read more

Reasons why Fran can get a 90,000 word novel down to a haiku if she's paid enough

Image
My first published story was in ‘Your Cat’ magazine.  (Don’t laugh … we all have to start somewhere.)  I sent the editor a 1500-word story.  She said she liked it (great!) and would publish it (fantastic!) but that I should cut it by a third and tighten up my style.  Ah.  Not so good. I loved every word of that story.  I gave birth to each one in pain and suffering, so there was NO WAY, absolutely NO WAY I was going to cut or change them.  I was determined.  I would stick to my guns.  She could forget it.  My mind was made up. Then she said she’d pay me £200 if I did the alterations.  I wavered for a whole nano-second.  U-turn Queen, that’s me, when it comes to hard cash. The editing of that heart-warming story about a couple who rediscover their love when their cat has a crisis (it was a real sick-bucket saga) taught me loads.  I hated making the changes.  I felt like a murderer, slashing and s...
Read more