Why I could be accused of needing to get out more
So, OBVIOUSLY, you're going to try typing Shakespeare in predictive text on your mobile and see which words it recognises and which it doesn't. It's great fun. And I have all kinds of new ideas for plays I could write and submit to the Royal Shakespeare Company.
"Out, fanned spot." - a woman with macho tendencies is disturbed by a skin lesion that has in all directions and is now the shape of a Chinese lady's cooling device with pictures of temples all over it.
"The lady Doug protest too much methinks." - a woman without macho tendencies, but whose parents gave her a boy's name because they liked it, complains bitterly, but unconvincingly.
"Et TV, Brute?" - a woman with a version of Tourette's syndrome which means she replaces all her English verbs with French ones complains to her ignorant and bullish husband about his boring plans for their evening
"Out! cried candle." - a pioneering inventor invents a nightlight which calls out when it realises a house owner has fallen asleep while it was still burning.
"I am a man more sinned against than pinning." - a man considers the things that have been done to him by his enemies, including the time they fixed him to a wall with the use of tacks, and decides that everything else they did was much, much worse.
"Full fathom five thy father kids." - Someone receives a revelation that, just when they thought their father was a dustman, he has been, for many years, a deep-sea-diver and stand-up comic.
Try it with Chaucer. Now that could be interesting.