Evidence that Fran would rather think up pedants' party games than get on with writing a real book
I need someone in the novel I'm
There once was a writer called Fran
Who said to herself, 'Yes, I can!
I can write me a novel -
make publishers grovel -
And she started to draw up a plan.
You see? That took me one minute flat. This damn novel is going to take me until 2046.
Anyway, I googled, 'Can you pick a lock without damaging it?'
I only had to type 'Can you pick a lock without ....' and it knew the rest. It seems like a popular search, alarmingly (ha ha - unintentional pun!) and took me to what I'm sure is a
Further digression: have you ever played the 'she said/he said' game, producing such puns? (Such puns! Inside joke for 'Miranda' fans.) You never have? People, what kind of parties are you GOING to?
The game is, you have to match the description of the speech to what the person said and make a pun, as in:
'But I'm still afraid a burglar might get in despite our precautions,' she said, alarmed.
'What do you mean, you can't finish the jigsaw?' he said, puzzled.
Or like this ...
'What kind of wood should I get the new table made in?' she pined.
I can't think of any more. (Martin, your turn.) And anyway, I was telling you about the lock-picking. Here are two of the things you need in order to be able to pick a lock, apparently.
- A paper clip or similar object or a flat sided hairpin
- a locked door
List 2. Earlier in the week, we put a new blind up in the bathroom. With the instructions came a list of tools that were 'needed' but 'not supplied'. Included in this list was 'step ladder'.
I said to my husband, 'You know, it's a good thing they mentioned this, because when I looked at the package the blind came in, I was hoping they'd included the stepladder, and it's a disappointment not to find one in here.'
|You'd have thought the same, wouldn't you? |