Evidence that drugs have been a big part of Fran's life this week

I've found myself talking about drugs twice in the last couple of days.

Only one of the incidents was intentional, and that wasn't the one that happened yesterday, when I innocently informed a class of sixth formers that 'I once won a typing competition on speed.'  They dissolved into laughter, leaving me as red as Karl Marx.

If you're a friend of mine on Facebook, you'll already have heard that story.  If you follow me on Twitter too you'll have heard it twice.  If you follow me down the street, you'll perhaps do what an old lady did in my Granny's care home the other day and comment loudly on the size of my bottom.  As Miranda Hart would say ....


(Fran was pleased to find this picture at last, especially as googling 'Rude' had
resulted in some images she hadn't expected.)


Anyway, back to my sixth form class, which has a slightly more supportive atmosphere than the care home, but not much.  I tried to turn the mega-gaffe into a pedagogical opportunity by pointing out to the students that if I had used a different preposition (with, instead of on) it would have made all the difference to the meaning, but, strangely, they weren't listening. They were too busy enjoying my discomfort, guffawing like hyenas at a Michael McIntyre gig.  Ah well. Pride comes before an Epic Fail.

Then, today, after overhearing someone at work talking about various prescription drugs, I found myself musing on the nature of some of their names, such as ....

Tramadol - a narcotic-like pain reliever
Panadol - another pain reliever
Carisoprodol - a muscle relaxant
Haloperidol - a tranquilliser


I had great fun thinking, along with another colleague, of some others.



Barbiedol - a pink tablet for women who want to develop the kind of body that means you fall over if you lean forward just a little too much
Livin'dol - medication for those who still go to Cliff Richard concerts and need urgent help to conquer this
Chinadol - a tranquilliser for those taking a long flight to the Far East and need to ignore crying babies and other people being sick
Russiandol - a tablet within a tablet within a tablet [my colleague's idea]
Babydol - a suppressant for middle-aged men who buy motorbikes and take a sudden liking to 22 year olds
Paperdol - a medicine for people addicted to cutting out strings of little people from white paper
Guysanddol - a tranquilliser for those disappointed after a visit to a Broadway musical in which all the female characters but one weren't able to perform


Can you think of any others?  I need to stock my medicine cabinet ready for any kind of emergency.





Comments

  1. Janie Junebug25/10/13 12:49

    I love drugs. I have nothing else to say.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
  2. Pam 25/10/13 13:54

    Waxdol - relief for those with OCD who feel the need to keep removing hair from various portions of their anatomy?

    Blowupdol - maybe better not go there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill25/10/13 14:07

      I deliberately didn't go for blowupdol, but I had a feeling at least one of my followers might.....

      Delete
    2. Anonymous25/10/13 15:15

      That would be ME!!

      Delete
    3. Pam 25/10/13 15:24

      Sorry. Lowered the tone...

      Delete
  3. stephen Hayes25/10/13 14:06

    My drug of choice is now legal in two states; unfortunately, my state isn't one of them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill25/10/13 14:11

      I'm guessing that's not caffeine, then.

      Delete
  4. Anonymous25/10/13 15:37

    These are NOT mine--I found them on the internet:

    Askap for diarrhea, Stasayne for depression,Tripnomo for schizophrenia & finally, Fuckitall for anxiety

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill26/10/13 01:57

      For a couple of those, I'm guessing you weren't looking at the website of the British Medical Association.

      Delete
  5. Linens and Royals25/10/13 17:27

    Catadol for those who love cats too much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill26/10/13 01:57

      I know some people who would say, 'Is that possible?'

      Delete
  6. Steve25/10/13 23:13

    Voodoodol - for those people who wish to transfer their ailments to other people.

    ReplyDelete
  7. BadPenny26/10/13 01:47

    My brother needs Babydol; he rides motorbikes & lives in Thailand ( I'll say no more )

    Maybe he needs a dose of Growupdol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill26/10/13 01:59

      Someone needs to invent that one. I think it might be popular.

      Delete
  8. SmitoniusAndSonata26/10/13 13:32

    Hangitol for those who have a tendency to worry about every minor detail .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill26/10/13 14:36

      Another good one. Can you imagine collecting your prescription from the chemist?

      Delete
  9. Anonymous26/10/13 14:34

    Iamadol for women who refuse to age...Faceliftadol...self explanatory, I would think.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous26/10/13 14:36

    Whatthefadoll...for those who loose their brilliant comment...to the blogger deamons.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill26/10/13 14:38

      If you mean your first one, it came through finadol.

      Delete
  11. Anonymous26/10/13 14:37

    Redfaceadol for those who regret their last comment.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill29/10/13 14:50

      Would that be one of those green creams you can get for covering up broken veins? Sounds good.

      Delete
  12. River26/10/13 21:49

    I have a complete mental blank on this one.
    Maybe some inventadol would help?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill27/10/13 00:12

      I like the idea of Inventadol. Maybe we could have Blogadol as well for when we can't think what to write.

      Delete
  13. Anonymous30/10/13 08:49

    Inspiradol for more general writers' block? Or Franadol, - for dealing with the withdrawal symptoms of not reading Fran's blog enough...you're always such a good giggle...(Actually Franadol sounds so feasible it might be a real drug?)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill30/10/13 09:31

      Ha ha. Nearly! http://www.drugs.com/cdi/frenadol.html

      Delete

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