Evidence that it's never too late to give old songs new life

Tonight I busied myself finding out what happens if you type one letter wrong in a Beatles song.  Voila! A nature theme emerges!

What do you mean, have I nothing useful to do?  I have PLENTY useful to do.  That is the point.




Hay Jude - a mournful ballad advising someone who's letting someone else get under their skin to take refuge in a barn.

All My Lowing - another farm-based tune in which cows pledge their undying commitment to other cows.

Nowhere Map - This song has a line that goes, 'Knows not where he's going to' and ends up with someone lost in a field because the Ordnance Survey people messed up and produced a blank.

Hay Tripper - the one-way ticket involved in this song is a ticket to the police cells after being found with illegal substances and as high as the Burj Khalifa during the harvesting.

With a little Kelp from my Friends - a happy little lyric all about someone whose social circle introduced them to natural homeopathic remedies.

Kelp! - the enthusiastic song promoting the homeopathic remedies sung by his social circle.

Happiness is a Farm Gun - this is a nostalgic ditty sung by those grieving the loss of the farmer's right to blast cheerfully away at anything that moved or nibbled at your cabbages.

Getting Butter all the Time - this song is a taunt, used to tease the newer dairy worker who doesn't quite know when to stop beating the cream.

Fixing a Mole - a nasty little tune about dealing with countryside pests, not a favourite song with the RSPCA.

The Beagles were excited about playing Glastonbury







Comments

  1. Janie Junebug18/6/14 15:34

    Oh how I laughed when I saw The Beagles. And now all I can think of is Festerday, when a lot of pus was draining from my nasty wound that makes me Fear There and Everywhere.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill19/6/14 06:32

      Oh, yuk. But brilliant! I will never hear 'Yesterday' again without thinking of that, and I have you to thank ...

      Delete
    2. Janie Junebug19/6/14 10:20

      You never fail to make me laugh.

      Delete
  2. Pam 18/6/14 15:45

    He he.
    Eleanor Rugby - she got very muddy but was a cheery, strapping lass. All You Need Is Gove - the new teachers' anthem. The Food On The Hill - description of a nice picnic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill19/6/14 06:32

      I prefer 'Food on the Hill' to the original.

      Delete
  3. stephen Hayes18/6/14 16:24

    This could be the start of a new songwriting career for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill19/6/14 06:33

      I'm glad someone's appreciated my incredible potential here.

      Delete
  4. Anonymous18/6/14 20:45

    Clever stuff, lady!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Steve18/6/14 23:11

    Norwegian Food (This Bird Has Flown) - A man goes to a KFC in Norway to find the store has closed down because all the chickens have escaped.

    ReplyDelete
  6. River19/6/14 01:26

    Your mind goes in the quirkiest directions.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Frances Garrood19/6/14 03:09

    Me? Shell? What hell!- the desperate cry of someone faced with the kind of seafood whIch comes with feet, face, claws etc. intact.

    We all live in a yellow mud machine - the anthem of those who dwell in a slurry tank.

    Fran, I wish you wouldn't do this. I have WORK to do!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill19/6/14 06:35

      I am that woman who sings Me? Shell? What hell? I hate that whole get-to-know-the-shellfish approach. I have work to do to too. This is the whole idea, finding things to do which you can kid yourself are worthwhile and get you out of the proper work.

      Delete
  8. Unknown19/6/14 05:05

    What about the Fag Four's post-Beagles careers? e.g. Paul's ode to a secret Scottish lover in "Moll of Kintyre". Also George's paean to fatty foods in "My Sweet Lard". Then there was Paul's promotion of disability awareness with "Mary Had a Little Limb".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill19/6/14 06:36

      Ha ha, very witty, Unknown, only I know who you are because you posted on Facebook too. I hope that was a nice little interlude for you in between your real work!

      Delete
  9. Pam 19/6/14 08:04

    Oh dear, it's addictive. I suppose I can't get away with Pussy In The Sky With Diamonds? Well, Rubber Soup, then, for that picnic on the hill. Honey (That's What I Want) - ditto.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill20/6/14 01:17

      I had to think about 'Rubber Soup' and then it clicked. Ha ha!

      Delete
  10. Iota 20/6/14 00:51

    Why haven't I found your blog before? This is hilarious.

    Hermione Granger to Harry Potter: I wanna hold your wand

    If you were ever absolutely desperate for tickets for a sell-out event at the last minute, and didn't konw where to go, I could give you the number of the Magical Mystery Tout.

    As I said to my husband last night, when he didn't lock away the portable barbecue, You're going to lose that gril.

    And when one of those beagles, looking all puppy-eyed, comes and appeals for food, heartlessly I'll turn my back and say to you "Let it beg"

    This is so much fun!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill20/6/14 01:02

      Having looked at your blog and your profile, and these comments of yours, I think we must be twins, separated at birth, and kept apart by the cruelty of fate.

      Delete
  11. Iota 20/6/14 00:52

    I have just linked to this post from my blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill20/6/14 00:59

      Marry me.

      Delete
    2. Fran Hill20/6/14 01:03

      Although, having just said I think we're twins, that's a LITTLE bit weird.

      Delete
    3. Iota 20/6/14 05:18

      I was just about to accept, but now you've qualified your proposal, I'm going to say no. Whoever wanted a proposal that was less than whole-hearted?

      I'm going to come back and have a good browse of your blog.

      Delete
  12. Iota 20/6/14 14:25

    I went to yoga today, and it inspired me to come back here and leave "Zen-ny Lane".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill22/6/14 15:26

      If I'd been to yoga it would have been Penny Lame.

      Delete
  13. BadPenny22/6/14 03:10

    Searching the shelves in the toiletries department of a supermarket;
    " can't buy me Dove " !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill22/6/14 15:26

      Ha ha. You really brought that one down to the mundane!

      Delete
  14. Anonymous24/6/14 03:18

    Post-haymaking remark by disconsolate farmer - I Should Have Mown Better
    Post-haymaking remark by contrite farmer - If I Seeded Someone
    Casual female tomato-picker - Poly-tunnel Pam

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fran Hill24/6/14 10:05

      I think Poly-tunnel Pam needs her own show, to be frank.

      Delete
  15. Iota 23/8/14 10:15

    Oh help, I'm back here again. What's happened to me?

    ReplyDelete

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