Evidence that if you can't get abroad this year, there are other options

Today, I challenged my Year 8 class (12 year olds) to write a piece of persuasive copy that could be used in a travel brochure. 'Imagine you are running a tour,' I said, 'to a place of interest. Persuade your target audience to sign up.'

They'd been studying travel brochures and advertisements as preparation for this, highlighting the persuasive devices used.

'The only snag is,' I said, 'it has to be the worst place imaginable. Somewhere you wouldn't dream of going to. Let's make a list.'

Among others, they thought of

1. The council dump
2. The back yard of McDonald's where the bins are
3. The sewage works
4. A landfill site
5. A stagnant pool

They were squeaky keen to read out their work when we'd finished, and there were spatters of applause after each one. Some were so funny. 

This is my version, but theirs inspired it. 

'Book now for a visit to the sewage works! You will be enchanted by a wide range of fascinating natural wildlife never encountered on your holidays in Corfu. Cobalt-winged bluebottles, giant flies, alighting delicately on your lunchtime sandwich with their gossamer wings, and - oooh, look, there's Mr Rat with his ratty youngsters, darting from place to place, the busy little creature he is. Breathe in the scent of sewage. Who needs the aroma of a salty Mediterranean ocean when here, right on your doorstep, you can experience the heady scent of sewage? It's a trip like no other. No air fares. No battling through Customs. No squeezing into a seat on a plane next to a three-year-old with the flu.  And make sure you don't miss our special Buy One Get One Free deal on BOGOF Sundays. It's your once-in-a-lifetime chance and the one visit that won't 'drain' your bank balance. Pick up the phone now. Sewage is the new Seychelles.' 

Today was one of those days I love being a teacher. 


  1. I love this so much I may have to steal it.

  2. Damn. I may have to come out of retirement just so I can use this.
    Brilliant, Fran.

  3. I love it--what a great post idea!! (I'll write my own, but I'm going to use this theme.)

  4. 'Sewage is the New Seychelles' is the 'Go To Work On An Egg' of our time . Brilliant !

    1. Something tells me it's not going to catch on as a slogan, though....

  5. It sounds like the trip to Lake Junebug that I advertised on my blog! No one signed up.


  6. I bet your year eights loved doing this.

    1. There wasn't enough time for them to read out all their pieces. I didn't think they'd be so keen ... We'll have to carry on in the next lesson!

  7. Interesting and descriptive, but it wouldn't make me visit the sewage works. Nothing on earth would make me visit a sewage works.

    1. Aw, come on. Not even for those pretty bluebottles?

  8. I have enough bluebottles around here right now, there's an occasional whiff of something dead in the deep grasses behind the flats.

  9. Such destinations are only accessible to an effluent society, Fran.


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