Reasons why I'm feeling nostalgic for my old manual typewriter
I have some observations to make after buying a new laptop at the weekend.
1. PC World is not the place to be when you're already feeling your age. I had to spend an hour in the kitchen when we got back. I used my food mixer, toaster and kettle, just to comfort myself that there were some things I could plug in and operate without having to watch a Youtube video first.
2. People who work in computer stores have a lumpy bit under their jumpers. My husband said it would be where a set of keys is attached to their belts, but I suspect they are the remnants of where the umbilical cord hasn't quite healed yet.
3. Shouting, 'Oh, I must have that one! Look - it's got a bright blue casing!' is the quickest way to make sure your husband sidles away from you and into the camera aisle.
4. Even though your new laptop does have a pretty blue casing, you will still want to hurl it at a wall when you can't work out how to install your antivirus software or connect it to your printer.
5. Trying to get used to Windows 8 is like wandering alone around a Scottish mountain, in a thick mist, while wearing a balaclava the wrong way round. If you find your way back to where you started, it was a fluke.
6. Until you have adapted to the ultra-sensitivity of a modern mouse pad on a new laptop, you will have to put up with a) a sudden unsolicited increase or decrease in font size on your screen; b) finding yourself about to play a Solitaire game when you were trying to do a Tesco order; c) sending an email when all you'd written was 'Hi - just thought I'd ...'
1. PC World is not the place to be when you're already feeling your age. I had to spend an hour in the kitchen when we got back. I used my food mixer, toaster and kettle, just to comfort myself that there were some things I could plug in and operate without having to watch a Youtube video first.
2. People who work in computer stores have a lumpy bit under their jumpers. My husband said it would be where a set of keys is attached to their belts, but I suspect they are the remnants of where the umbilical cord hasn't quite healed yet.
3. Shouting, 'Oh, I must have that one! Look - it's got a bright blue casing!' is the quickest way to make sure your husband sidles away from you and into the camera aisle.
Fran wasn't so interested in its Intel Core i3-4030U Processor as she could have been |
4. Even though your new laptop does have a pretty blue casing, you will still want to hurl it at a wall when you can't work out how to install your antivirus software or connect it to your printer.
5. Trying to get used to Windows 8 is like wandering alone around a Scottish mountain, in a thick mist, while wearing a balaclava the wrong way round. If you find your way back to where you started, it was a fluke.
6. Until you have adapted to the ultra-sensitivity of a modern mouse pad on a new laptop, you will have to put up with a) a sudden unsolicited increase or decrease in font size on your screen; b) finding yourself about to play a Solitaire game when you were trying to do a Tesco order; c) sending an email when all you'd written was 'Hi - just thought I'd ...'
Blue AND within Fran's technical capabilities |
Laughing... again.
ReplyDeleteGood, good. This is how I want it to be.
DeleteWe had a blue typewriter just like the one in the photo. I wonder what happened to her. Could she be resurrected? I guess not.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
When enough of us have thrown our laptops at the wall, she might fetch a bomb on ebay, so keep hold of her.
DeleteSomeone I know threw someone else's laptop through a window recently. It's terrible, but I'm amused.
DeleteSo true...It makes you yearn for the good old days doesn't it? You know, when there was actually nothing to do once in a while and Mars Bars cost only sixpence...I feel your pain. But it cheers me up and makes me laugh a lot too :) Great post...
ReplyDeleteI think you know my Mars Bar story .... I went into a shop and told a little girl once that Mars Bars were 4p when I was her age. She looked at me with awe and said, 'Were Mars Bars invented in your day?' Nothing to DO once in a while? Don't. I'll cry.
DeleteLike you, I get totally frustrated with modern technology. Sure, these gadgets make some things more simple, but is it worth the problems and insecurities these cause? Of course I'm writing this on a computer so that means I'm full of you-know-what.
ReplyDeleteYes, I-know-what and I'm full of it too. I think I'd soon get fed up if I had to correct a mistake with Tippex on four different carbon copies, the way I used to have to.
Deletestill get tripped up by the 'spontaneous' zoom out, or in. No, wait, I didn't ... never mind. Let's try again.
ReplyDeleteWindows 8 I did get used to. I start with a familiar desktop, like it used to be.
I'm glad it's not just me. It's so disconcerting when suddenly there are only three words on the screen, yelling at me.
DeletePS Windows 9 looms on the horizon.
ReplyDeleteNoooooooooooooooooo! I'm already feeling SO left behind.
DeleteThey've just said they're going to skip that and move briskly on to Windows 10 , I think .
DeleteRemind me again , what was wrong with smoke signals ?
Why does progress invariably mean less comprehensible? I totally sympathise. I was left behind years ago, in an old phone box, pressing button B. I liked button B. you got your money back.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! I have a great vision of you in that phone box, pressing button B for eternity!
DeleteI'm a little nostalgic for windows98, which I loved because it was easy and had the really great screen saver patterns. Now I have windows7 and I'm mostly used to it after 4 years. I agree with Frances above me here, why does progress have to mean less comprehensible? It's okay for all the 5 year olds out there, but we older persons need a bit of simplicity. plug and play!
ReplyDeleteThere was something to be said for the quill and the parchment, that's all I'm saying.
DeleteIf it's any comfort you can still use Tippex on a laptop. Though it might void your guarantee.
ReplyDeleteHa ha! THAT'S where I went wrong! We used to love Tippex when I was 18 and on my secretarial course at college. We used to sniff the thinner when the typing exercises got a bit boring.
Deletemy laptop is literally a pain in the neck as I get neck ache when using it... but I still love it !
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean - I have mine on one of those lap trays sometimes in order to get it more level with my head, otherwise I get the same.
DeleteBut just think how smug you'll feel when you do get the hang of it (probably just before it, too, becomes obsolete ...)
ReplyDeleteYou're right, though - they don't give us a chance to feel smug before they bring in another one to take us back to feeling inadequate and stupid.
DeleteThey're all so young, aren't they? The sales people in those places.
ReplyDelete